Author Topic: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭  (Read 376 times)

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Offline Texas Pete

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #90 on: January 11, 2021, 01:55:20 pm »
What begins with a P, ends with an E and has a million letters in it?
Post office.



Why’s a graveyard the safest place in quarantine?

Everybody’s 6 feet away.

Offline El Payaso

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Life is so brief, and time is a thief.
Like a fistful of sand, it will slip right through your hand.
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Offline Texas Pete

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #92 on: January 19, 2021, 08:30:40 pm »

Offline Poppi

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #93 on: January 22, 2021, 11:01:25 pm »

Offline Cygnus-X1

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #94 on: January 23, 2021, 09:22:23 pm »
A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”
I’m rolling!! 🤣🤣🤣
Some see space as the void and time as a constant when neither is true.
Cygnus-X1

You don't get rich writing science fiction. If you want to get rich, you start a religion.
~ L. Ron Hubbard

Offline El Payaso

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Life is so brief, and time is a thief.
Like a fistful of sand, it will slip right through your hand.
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Offline Texas Pete

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #96 on: February 05, 2021, 05:56:51 pm »
A gas station owner was trying to increase his sales, so he put up a sign that read, “Free Sex with Every Fill-Up.”
Rob pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. The owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10, and said that if he guessed correctly, he would get his free sex. Rob said “today is my birthday, i’m feeling LUCKY and I guess 8”.

The owner said, “You were very close, the lucky number was 7. Sorry, no sex this time.”

A week later, Rob, with his friend Marvin, pulled in for another fill-up. Again Rob asked for his free sex. The proprietor again gave him the same story, and asked him to guess the correct number. Rob guessed 2. The proprietor said, “Sorry, it was 3, you were very close, but no free sex this time.”

As they were driving away, Marvin said to Rob, “I think that game is rigged and he doesn’t really give away free sex at all.”

Rob replied, “No it’s genuine enough Marvin. My wife won twice last week.”
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Online Papa Smurf

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #97 on: February 09, 2021, 11:39:45 am »
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Online Papa Smurf

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #98 on: February 09, 2021, 11:40:35 am »
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Offline El Payaso

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Life is so brief, and time is a thief.
Like a fistful of sand, it will slip right through your hand.
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Offline Texas Pete

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Re: Daily Jokes, just for Laughs 🤭
« Reply #100 on: February 25, 2021, 10:22:25 pm »
My memory has gotten so bad it has actually caused me to lose my job. I’m still employed. I just can’t remember where.
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Offline El Payaso

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Life is so brief, and time is a thief.
Like a fistful of sand, it will slip right through your hand.